I accused myself for the hard years i had in my child years ,and i didn’t win .I accused myself for the poverty in my child years and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the bad hidden laughter of the other kids , for my poverty in my child years and i didn’t win . I accused myself for the phycological problems caused by poverty , i had as a child and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the mistakes i did as a kid , most of them was made as a reaction of my inner problems and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the problems my family had and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the problems i had in school , even if i tried without any external help and i dind’t win .

I accused myself for the birthday parties i didn’t have as a kid and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the joy i “dared” to feel as an innocent kid and i didn’t win . I accused myself for the defeats we had in our football team , i stopped enjoy the “game” , i never tried to play again and i didn’t win . I accused myself for my failures in my step steps in the love area , as a teenager and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the failures i had in the love area , as a grown up human , mostly caused by my souls “injured spots” i “earned” , during my youth and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the attempts i had , to enter the university i wanted and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the failures i had in my university i finally entered , without wanted it so much and i didn’t win . I accused myself for the extra years i needed to finish this “necessary” university and i didn’t win .

I accused myself , because i never worked in the area i have studied and i didn’t win . I accused myself for the countless fights , i have with my friends , family , society ,which wanted to “obey” their rules and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the right rules , i didn’t obey and the wrond rules i obey and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the lost “friends” and i didn’t win .I accused myself for not realizing , that they were never friends and i didn’t win .I accused myself for the friends , i let go for wrond reasons and i didn’t win .

I accused myself because i feel so happy for my friends for life i have and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for my empty pockets and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for my fully pockets after my hard work , watching the world’s poverty so close to us and i didn’t win .

I acused myself for the less guilt i have felt and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the big guilt i have felt and i din’t win . I accused myself for the joy i “dared” to feel and i din’t win .

I accused myslef for the joy i dared to feel , because this made my surroundings feel a “little” uncomfort and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for not taking the hole responsibility of my divorce and i didn’t win .

I accused myself for the divorse my brother/sister/friend took and wasn’t able to do anything and i didn’t win . I accused myself , I accused myself , I accused myself so many times . And in all of these times , i have lost .

I WILL NEVER LOSE AGAIN……