I ” step back “ to see my best friend’s life , with the appropiate distance which clears your mind and heart , and what i saw didn’t made me happy .

I ” step back “ to realize the reality(!) he made for himself , and the pain i felt was one of the biggest i’ve ever felt in my entire life .

A deep pain which if you don’t control , it is capable to destroy your life for good and PERMANENTLY . A soul pain which is ” hiding ” behind the society’s nowdays illnesses as : depresion ,phycological problems in any variety , total anxiety , stress and the list is endless .

I ” step back “ to see his evolution in life and maybe give him some advices , and i find a person so confused . In the correct life path , but so CONFUSED .

Confused in the tiny details in HIS daily minor activities , but minor activities which very easily can cause you , your life’s final victory : the CONQUEST of YOUR DREAMS .

I ” step back “ and i saw my best in my life ,waste his time doing unwise things ,only for the satisfaction of passing the day doing ” something ” , as all the other people do . So he won’t be alone , won’t taste the loneliness of the day .

He has pursuit himself that hemust tolerate everything from anyone , simply for having some ” buddies ” , for having someone to go out on saturday night .

He is “afraid” , to draw a line , to put limits to his suroundings , being so afraid of the possibility of being alone in life . I “ step back ” seen him so confused running and having tons of stress , trying to have all of his people around him satisfied .

Even if he knows inside him that anything which isn’t TRUE and HONEST in this world , doesn’t last , he is so afraid .

Ι ” step back “ and seen him so empty and unhappy , returning home late at knight after a somekind of a party or something like that .

I ” step back “and seen him so unhappy in his bed after making love with a lover he/she doesn’t love just for the satisfaction of the societies measures .

I ” step back “ and seen him playing the dork or the fool in his companies , ” begging ” for love and acceptance from the others .

I “step back ” and seen him trying to satisfy all of the others except of himself ( which i must accept was making him so proud ) , and i feel so strange .

I ” step back ” and seen him come down into poverty ,abadonment ,so slowly inch by inch every day without realize that he‘s digging his grave .

And the most importand thing is that his dreams are moving away from his horizon so tricky , but he thinks that he controls the situation .

I ” step back ” and seen him drinking coffe alone sometimes , wondering what to do so he could find a ” sister soul ” in his life and why the others finds them so easy and he cannot .

I ” step back “ and seen him trying to find the meaning of his life searching in wrong places ,with the wrong people , with the wrong methods , in the wrong time and places . And a huge melanholy came through my bones .

I TAKE A STEP FORWARD and say to MYSELF : I’m so proud of you because you wanted to help the hole world ,even if your strengths are so tiny .

I’m so proud of you ,wanted to make your friends – family – wife – kids et.c , smile all the time throwing your ego and self deep down , accepting anything they say to you , hiding your wounds from they words sometimes .

I ‘m so proud of you , that you don’t ask for something in return for the things you do with your entire heart , just to help . I’m so proud of you . I don’t want to change something in your personality .

I know that you don’t hear anything from noone , according these matters .

You do things your way ( i’m proud for this too !!!!! ) . I only want to ask you , this . I want to ” beg “(!!) you for this :

See yourself as , a ” stranger ” , who needs your LOVE and CARE .

See yourself as a homeless guy , someone very week and GIVE HIM YOUR BIG HEART and ATTENTION .

And the most importand : Taking care of yourself doesn’t make you a bad person or a cruel and selfish one .

Don’t be ashamed to LOVE yourself .