I don’t like to LOSE !!!! . I don’t like the fealings of loosing , in any way .

I don’t like the emotion , of giving the BEST i can give and at the end . i’m the second one . Because in my deep personal beleif , second is the first of the losers . Strange and maybe an extreme mentality ? Maybe , but this is my mentality .

Forged with tons of pain , tons of misery nights home alone thinking , tons of nights wondering why these bad things is happening to me , tons of nights praying to my GOD tons of nights wondering why GOD doesn’t answers to my prayers .

Tons of sleepless nights trying to sleep and failing even in that ,tons of days trying to handle the un-human stress i felt making walks in nature , praying that the trees and the rivers could help my “stormy” soul .

Tons of moments trying to find someone who can understand the torture i pass through tons of moments facing the brutality in the highest level of our modern society , which can demolish you , in a glimpse of an eye , IF YOU LET IT .

Tons of weeks living as a loser deep inside me and seeing this , in everybody’s eyes when they speak to you and typically smiles , trying to be polite .

JESUS how many moments i’ve passed feelings as a garbage . As someone who cannot achive something without any external help ,without the “golden” help of my surroundings who ” always knows better ” . The help of the cold-blooded society ,if you obey its rules totally and SHUT YOUR MOUTH !!!!!!! .

Because you’re only a number , nothing else !!! . In my humble opinion , these times a human passes , are the most difficult in his life , exept a serious health problem , of course .

Because these times , your faith as a soul is at stake !! . These so personal moments , unveils in the surface your personality characteristics , with no cover up with no excuses .

These unique moments , the abilities your CREATOR has given to you the time of your birth , unveil in your surface , as “weapons” .

The use of these “weapons” , is up to you . I suppose you’ve heard these personal “weapons” , with so many words . Countless people , writers , poets , musicians , politicians ,athletes ,they spoke about these “weapons” ,trying to persuade you for their significance .

But if you haven’t heard the “wolves coming” , desiring your “flesh” , you cannot understand , the meaning of those “weapons” , in REAL LIFE !!!!!

And real life is hard my friends , and i’m not a philosopher !!!!! . I’m just a common human , who DOESN’T WANT TO LOSE , no matter what the cost maybe .

I ‘m not a very bright human , i suppose as the philosher guys or the poets , or the world writers , but i only know this : I DON’T LIKE DEFEAT .

So i must find ways to win , in the area i like , in the area which i believe i’m good at it . In the area ,which MY DREAMS EXIST !!!!

I must find ways to use every “soul tool” i have , every “weapon” my human existance has and i must take the 110% , from them with no excuses , with minimum mistakes .

I must find the way , to be the last who will stand on his feet , as a winner , no matter how difficult the ” war zone” i will fight is . I also must find the way , not to lose myself during this process and pass the “riverside” without loosing my soul , my kindness ,my humor , my primitive and original self .

This is a bet , very crucial for me because , if i win and at the end of the “road” , i’d be someone else worse of what i was at the beggining of my journey to victory , in substance i’ d be the biggest loser .

Nothing material in this earth , is worth your soul and your mental health . I know that outhere , human winners exists who are willing to teach me “things” , from their huge experience without anticipating anything from me .

They have the kindness and selflessness to help me , to show me roads and technics which worked for them – and i THANK THEM so much – but , the final “job” must be made by me , and only me .

I MUST NOT DO the mistakes of the past !!!

It’s a big mistake avoiding your responsibilities ,regerdless your age ( ok when you’re a tiny kid , don’t be so hard with you , you’ll learn from your “newbie” mistakes ) .

Don’t load your responsibilities to other shoulders , which i suppose will let you down .

Family , surroundings , friends , bad society , the “system” ,the “bad” and sneaky humans who “always betray you” , the lack of money which , “always” make you postpone your plans”,the “bad goverment agencies” which “always brakes your plans and evolution” , and wants you to fail , because they are “vengeful” and “vicious” , so it’s “excusable” to FAIL .

It’s “excusable” to quit your effords because ,it ” isn’t in your powers to do something ” !!!!!!!!!

You must admit , how nice this sounds to your ears and especially in your close surrounding ears : I can’t do anything . It’s beyond of my powers , of any human powers . So DON’T BLAME ME !!! , i’m CLEAN !!!

When you feel your first stress ,at your first attemps to win you’re brain and mentality maybe will block out and be uncapable to give solutions . Remember , this is a brand new state of situation for you and it’s very human , to lose control , a little bit .

Don’t be afraid . Make a step behind , try to see the “big” picture and the new parameters .Let your instict guide you at first ( it’s a survival primitive ability , we all have ) , and then when the “danger” passes , start working with your mind .

Try to unlock the problem , with “COLD-BLOODED” psychology and clearness in your brain ( that’s why an elite physical state is needed – the body helps the mind ) ,and the solution unlocking the details , will come .

Unsolved problems , don’t exist (exept some in health area , unfortunately) . After this process , you’ll become to see “light at the end of the tunel” and the first thing you’ll feel is over – excitement !!!!

Next your self – confidence will go sky-high !!!!!!

It’ a very natural and human reaction . You’ve passed , from total “darkness” ,into a little bit light . But hear me out , this is a very significant moment .Your reaction in this specific moment , will define EVERYTHING !!!! .

Yes you may consider that i’m overreacting saying you THIS , but i’ve seen people WINNING or LOSING doing a very big mistake , conserning this tiny detail .

After a very stressful personal period , trying to achieve something , trying to become the best of all . you manage to get a tiny victory in the “battle field”, a tiny light which it’ll make you very happy . Then you let yourself to believe ,that “YOU HAVE WON THE WAR” ,that the job is done .

Immediately you let yourself to relax and reduse your focus under the 100% , more than a day and a knigh , it’s very possible ,to TOTALY LOSE the WHOLE WAR !!!

It’s a very important element , during your “journey” to achieve your goals , not to let your brain to relax 100% , before you completely achieve what you want to achieve .

NEVER BEFORE !!!!!!

I can imagine that this approach , is maybe extreme and seems unnecessary ( many will say that it isn’t so bad to relax a little ) , but i know this : when i was fighting for something which meant everything to me ,i couldn’t sleep at knights , as i normally sleep .

No matter how much time it needed to do the “job” .

Deep inside me i knew that , a couple of days during the time of my effords , i needed to ease my “boiling” brain , but never more than a hole day .This “cruel” mentality , matures you you as a person , without understand the process of course . It’s “pure magic” .

So after this situation period , you would be more tough as a person , you’d have gone into terratories you’ve never gone before . So what this whole “thing” , will benefit you ?

To withstand , the countless defeats you’ll taste , till you become a true Winner .